Xena: Season 2, Episode 15: "A Day in the Life"

"A Day in the Life:" The girls wake up to a fight, Gabrielle tweaks over a frying pan and Xena invents the kite. Totally brilliant.

Sorry, Ben. You're a little late!

This episode jumps right in with Greek headlines prefacing each segment of the episode, the English translation falling below it. (For instance, the first scene and segment is titled “Waking Up.”) From the first second, we know we’re in for something a little different (as we’re shot into the realization that, of course, Xena and Gabrielle actually would have spoken Greek) and our interest is peaked.

Lots of subtext going on, which adds to this ep’s infamous status of “cult favorite.” For example, when Gabrielle sends Hower to collect firewood after Xena goes fishing, Xena sits down next to Gabrielle and... they look awfully snug together on that log. Several conversations take place in which it's explained to Hower that Xena's "not having it." In fact, so we're clear, here they all are:

1) H: “Let me ask you something, Gabrielle. Does Xena ever think about settling down and getting married?” G: “No; she likes what I do- I think she likes what she’s doing. No, I don’t think settling down is for Xena.” H: “Hmm... maybe she just hasn’t met the right guy.”G: “You know, anything’s possible, Hower.”

2) G: “Minia, Xena would never take anybody’s boyfriend. She has more integrity in that way than anyone I’ve ever met.”

3) X: “Hower, Minia’s a good woman. She loves you. You’re lucky to have her. And you got a snowball’s chance in Tartarus with me. You got that?”

Xena don't want no scrub. Then, to top it off, Minia goes ahead and spells it out for us. She says this to Xena about the whip that Gabrielle just traded for a frying pan: “No! It belongs to me! You don’t get that concept very well, do you? The whip is mine. The frying pan’s yours. Hower is mine!... She’s yours.” Of course, we all know the "she" that Minia refers to is Gabrielle of Potidaea.

Let's not even mention the “I let you get this close” scene. It was intense and I looked around my apartment self-consciously to make sure no one was watching me. It felt as though I was intruding on a private moment and needed to find an exit, quick. Good shit. No wonder this ep is the bomb.

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EXTRAS: 

1) The whole thing with Gabrielle bonking Xena in the nose with her staff is adorable. And then she gives Xena a sweet lil kiss on the head, which Xena resents, because she's stoic.

2) X: “Well, you were there. Why didn’t you ask him?” G: “Oh, like you would want me to butt in on one of your pinch interrogations?” X: “Why not? You ask good questions.” G: “Really? Thank you.” - I love this shit. 

3) G: “Were you killed by a certain Warrior Princess?” X: “Yes.” G: “Well, that narrows it down. A little." - NICE.

4) G: "Another one’s fallen for you.” X: “Again?” G: “Yeah.” X: “Why does this always happen?” G: “It’s the blue eyes, the leather. Some guys just love leather.” X: “I think a wardrobe change is in order.” G: “You could wear chain mail.” X: “Yeah, but I think that’d just attract a kinkier group.” G: “You’re probably right.” - Another comment like this is made later and they're just hilarious. I believe that this is how Xena and Gabrielle would really talk behind the scenes.

5) G: “Well, what was I supposed to use, huh? You threw our only good cutting knife at a warlord last week. I bet it’s still sticking out of his thigh.” - This shit is so funny!

6) M: “All right! I finally get to meet the, the Warrior Princess herself! I’ve heard about all your adventures. How you unchained death, and, and liberated Prometheus, and nailed that Callisto witch.” – OK. I thought I heard “bitch” here. Still not convinced it's "witch," but either way is good.

7) Does she sleep in the-” G: “Well-” X: “Hey!” – Because… you know, rumor has it that Xena sleeps in the nude and Gabrielle is about to explain!

8) M: “Hello, Hower! Xena’s here! Isn’t she incredible?! So strong, so confident, so brave, so-” H: “Beautiful.” M: “Well, she’s all right, if you like that type.” - I kind of love Minia for her unabashed admiration for Xena (at first).

9) X: “Hey! Hower, say goodbye to Minia.” - I love that Xena says this. She's so good. She really cares!

10) G: “Look; we have to cook our food. I am still waiting for the fish I had for lunch to stop trying to swim upstream!” - This line is very subtle, but it's there. See it?

11) M: “Xena’s old buddy, Goliath, wanted to get revenge on Gareth for killing his family, but then, Xena and Goliath ended up on opposite sides during the Israelite-Philistine feud, and then Goliath got wasted.” - The way she says this is masterful and amazing.

12) G: “Hey, don’t get defensive. I just don’t share your vision here.” X: “There were plenty of other times when you didn’t share my vision.” G: “Yes, and you were right those other times. But, eventually you’re going to be wrong. Call it the law of averages. I just as soon it not be when the biggest giant to ever walk the Earth is headed our way!” - The law of averages? Gabrielle's brilliant.

13) X: “How did it go with Hower?” G: “Not well. Maybe you could kick him around a little bit.” X: “Yeah. No, he might like it.” G: “That’s true. Hmm.” - Their candor here is spot-on. And FUNNY.

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