Xena: Season 5, Episode 10: "Lyre, Lyre, Hearts on Fire"

ALTERNATIVE TITLE:
“Season 5 Musical”

This is such a cute idea, with the lyre sounding like an electric guitar and turning this episode into a rock musical. I loved it. 

Some friends recently explained to me what it means for a show or movie to be "meta." When Xena whistles, then later on plays, her own theme song, that is meta. I know other meta moments have happened in the show. Guess I gotta go back and rewatch it all to see!

Loved the music in this so much. And, god, Gabrielle is so fucking hot in this.

Here are my takes during notes about whether or not this episode is a favorite: 

1) You’ll notice this episode and the last musical episode are not favorites, and that’s because these aren’t exactly what I’m looking for in a Xena episode.
2) This is def a fave.
3) Still trying to decide if it’s a favorite. Would I want to watch this over and over? What do I get out of it?

Girl, the jury's still out.

Number of:

Twin brothers Joxer now has: 2
Times Joxer hits himself in the head with a hammer: 2
Men Cyrene tries to set Xena up with: 4

Songs in Order of 'pearance:

1. "War" – Edwin Star
2. "Getting Ready" which is actually original lyrics set to "The Telephone Hour" from the musical Bye Bye Birdie
3. "Dancing in the Moonlight" – King Harvest
4. "Always Something There to Remind Me" – Dionne Warwick but you probs remember the Naked Eyes version
5. "Sisters are Doing It For Themselves" – The Eurythmics & Aretha Franklin
6. "Kick Out the Jams" – MC5
7. A Xena original rap/rock song
8. "People Got to Be Free" – The Rascals

SPOILERS: My reviews are full of them! I'll try to note when I'm about to spoil the series by posting [SERIES SPOILER] before said item and [END SPOILER] after. Please don't read the review, unless you've seen the episode under discussion or don't care if I spoil it.

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EXTRA LOVED:

1) Xena declaring the battle of the bands

2) Dance confrontations between the Amazons and Draco & Co

3) Xena and Gabrielle dancing to “Dancing in the Moonlight”

4) Gabrielle raising her eyebrow at Draco

5) Xena drinking milk in the bar

6) Gabrielle telling-off Draco
7) The outfits for “Sisters Are Doing It for Themselves”

EXTRA QUOTES:

1) Cyrene: "Xena!" X: "Mom!" Cyrene: "So, it's true! And when were you going to tell me?" X: "Amphipolis was my very next stop." Cyrene: "Well, you look positively radiant. When are we gonna meet your special someone?" X: "If you mean the father, the answer's never. He's not in my life." Cyrene: "But Xena, every child needs a father!" X: "You raised me on your own." Cyrene: "I attest that would have been much easier with help." X: "I have help, Mom." Cyrene: "You have now." – Absolutely love this exchange, the delivery, the info, everything.

2) X: "Oh, Gabrielle, sign them up." G: Kill me, please." Joxer: "Aw, come on. They can't all be mediocre." G: "No, they all suck. Sadly, everyone in the music capital of Greece is tone deaf." – I love that the word “suck” is so heavily associated with bad bands.

3) Amoria: "Don't try so hard, Joxer. Didn't anyone ever tell you the quickest way to win a woman's heart is by making her laugh?" Joxer: "Oh well, in that case, I'm the sexiest man in the world."

4) Jace: "Play the game." Joxer: "No." Jace: "Play the game!" Joxer: "No, Jace not now." Jace: "Where is he? I don't see my little brother! Where is he? There he is!” – This is funny.

5) X: “I'm telling you for the last time politely, I do not need help finding a man!" Cyrene: "No? But finding the right man, now that's a different story." X: "I'm beginning to remember why I left home so young." – This is treated like it’s supposed to be funny, but this is intense.

6) Joxer: "Look, Gabrielle you don't understand. Things are different. We're not kids, anymore. I'm a warrior, now, and Jace is still Jace." G: "So you're telling me that you're so heartless towards him because he's " Joxer: "Different? Different and, he is " G: "Yes?" Joxer: "He's wasting his life. He is wasting his life. That's it. I am a warrior and he is" G: " your brother? No matter what else he is, he will always be that." – This is remarkable. This is the first time on Xena they’ve talked about homosexuality directly.

7) Man: "Xena, right?" X: "Who wants to know?" Man: "I saw your ad 'Single Greek female seeks marriage with stable provider to raise a child and to dote on an exceptionally wonderful mother who doesn't look a day over twenty." – Hahahaaha, I can't believe they did this.

8) G: "Xena I, um, I wanna ask you something." X: "Well, make it snappy. I've got a lot of single Greek losers to turn down." – Hahhahahaa

9) X: "I'm going to kill you." – This made me lol.

10) X: "I have a family. I've got Gabrielle I've got Joxer and as much as it pains me to say it, I've got you. This child's life will be filled with more than enough love." – I love all of Lucy Lawless’s dialogue with Cyrene in every single episode featuring Cyrene’s. It’s a treasure.

11) Cyrene: "You've always danced to the beat of your own drum, Xena. I suppose it would be foolish of me to stop you now."

12) G: "Um, the concert's about to start. All right. I need to make an announcement. There's some bad souvlaki going around, so stay away from the souvlaki.” – Hahahaha, this is a reference to Woodstock and the brown acid announcement.

13) G: "You all right?" Joxer: "What do you think?" G: "Joxer, she's a rocker chick. What did you expect? I have to admit, I, uh, thought it was kind of strange seeing you with her. It's only 'cause I'm so used to your, you know, being around me, and that kind of thing." Joxer: "Mm-hm like a puppy-dog." G: "That's not what I meant." Joxer: "Gabrielle, you are sort of used to having me around when you need me." G: "I know I take advantage of you, Joxer, but I care about you." Joxer: "Hm?" G: "You mean a lot to me." Joxer: "OK, so, what are you doin' tonight?" G: "Not a chance in Tartarus." – Amazing.

14) X: "Now, Terpsichore wanted this lyre to spread music so I don't think that it's fair that only one person should own it. And that's why I'm leaving it here in the musical capital of Greece, because Melodia, you rooock!" – Fun fact: the current live music capital of the world is Austin, Texas.

Here is Beyonce, doing like the ancients do and successfully crowdsurfing during "Halo."

And here's a compilation of failed crowdsurfing attempts, not unlike what happened to Draco.

I gotta admit, the only reason I rewatched the whole series and did these reviews was so that I could post this song.

Jimi Hendrix setting his guitar on fire, but remember, he got this idea from Draco who did it first in Melodia. 

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